What Gay Marriage (Marriage Equality) Means to Me

I have been spending a lot of time in retrospection trying to understand what God is doing in my life and what he wants me to do. It seems that a lot of history has been made this week. A bill that would make abortions very difficult to get in Texas was struck down by an epic filibuster and the Supreme Court struck down some of the provisions of the Defense of Marriage Act. Both of these things make me happy.

Now, before I begin, I will tell you why I think DOMA should have been deemed unconstitutional from the beginning. It has nothing to do with religion or God. Our constitution includes the Full Faith and Credit Clause. In practice, this clause means that legal records and judgments made in one state shall be recognized in another. Put another way, if I am convicted of murder and sentenced to life in prison in Nevada but flee to California, I will still be arrested and put in prison. This extends to legal records as well. For all of us that have moved to a different state than our birth state, we know that you don't have to get a new certificate of birth in your new state. Marriage licenses and certificates are legal records. That record is recognized in other states. The Full Faith and Credit Clause makes DOMA unconstitutional in that it allows states and the government to ignore these legal records that were obtained legally in other states.

But that is apparently beside the point.

Full disclaimer: I mostly identify as being straight but I do have some feelings toward other women occasionally. I identify as being straight because the amount of men I find to be physically attractive far outweighs the women and that I've never really wanted to start a relationship with another woman.

With that out of the way, I believe God makes us all they way we are for a reason. I am tall and slightly manish. I have a mind for engineering and I suffer from depression I also enjoy singing. I believe all of these were given to me by God to put me on the path that he wants me to be on. I don't always understand the reasons but I try to use what I have to follow the path set out of for me. Being scientifically minded as well, I have seen the studies and research that shows that sexual orientation and identity is linked to specific activity in the brain. One study, done in 2008, showed that people who like men have similar brains. I believe that God has made certain people gay just like he made me with greenish blue eyes. I don't understand the reason but I believe this is part of God's plan for that person.

When Jesus began his ministry, one of the things he was known for was breaking the rules. He would "work" on the Sabbath, associate himself with lowlifes and he spoke out against the Pharisees. The word pharisee means set apart and the Pharisees of the New Testament believed themselves to be righteously set apart by God and that this gave them the right to go to heaven. They followed the rules strictly and looked down on those who couldn't. Jesus came in and told them they were all the same. Jesus spoke out against this inequality that the Pharisees has made in the Jewish society. He made ALL equal in sin and ALL equal in their chance to achieve salvation. This extended to the prostitutes of the New Testament. Does this not also extend to gay people. Just because my life and my sin does not look like theirs does not mean I get to marginalize them as being unholy, unrighteous, sinful, and without rights.

With the past three paragraphs, I validated the existence of gay people in God's plan. Now I will tell you why they should be allowed to get married or, rather, why people who are of legal age should be allowed to marry whomever they wish.

I believe that God wants us to be happy and content. I do not believe that he made us to suffer constantly. He gave us voices that can sing and bodies that can dance so that we can express joy. If God has made some people gay then gay people are meant to be be happy too. God does not guarantee that we will always find a reason to dance all the time but we are meant to find happiness and contentment in our lives.

Marriage is indeed defined in the Bible. However, we have also made in our society a definition of marriage that does not have a  religious root. This societal marriage is purely legal. I am married and I know that, while I said vows, the only part the state cared about was the signing of the contract. In that, I believe there are effectively two forms of marriage. One is the faith based marriage where you form a covenant before God with the person you marry. The other is government based where you sign a contract with another person and this allows you certain rights. Both are present in my marriage but one can exist without the other. I believe that this is the honest solution to the "problem" we have in our current society. Our own constitution calls for use to have a separation of Church and State. Let us separate it here as well. Anyone who is of legal age can go and sign a marriage licence at a courthouse and become legally married and have the rights that gives them. This should be the only way to get those legal rights. If those two people also want to form a covenant before God, then they can find a church that approves of their marriage and they can become spiritually married as well. This gives people the right to marry whomever they wish but also allows churches only perform marriages they support. This allows a true separation of Church and State in this situation without taking rights from anyone.

In conclusion, I believe God makes us the way we are, even gay people. I believe God wants us to be happy. I believe marriages have two parts, spiritual and legal, that can exist independently of each other. But most of all, I believe that Jesus preached equality in all aspects of our lives and that we need to support equality.

I know I mentioned being happy about an abortion bill being killed in a filibuster but I don't have time to talk about it just now. Maybe another time?

I've been meaning to get over here

Sorry I haven't posted in forever. I am lazy and boring and not many people read this anyway.

So here are the updates:

Reading the book is going slowly because I have a lot of school working getting in the way but I am reading it.

School work... nuff said

I've started a new program called a Couch to 5k by Cool Runnings. It is going really well. My boyfriend, Alex, and I are on the second week and just finished day two. It's hard and I have to push myself but I feel good after every work out. It is fantastic! I love the way I feel afterward and, even though I dread doing it a little, I really see myself finishing this. If we stay on track, we should finish just in time for winter break.

I love running with my boyfriend. I think it has given us something to bond over and we are great cheerleaders. I think I want to keep doing this with him. We need the together time. I feel that we have gotten even closer this past week and a half. I love him so much.

I am also playing an elaborate game of tag called Humans vs Zombies (HvZ). It has been one day and I am still human and I have had a lot of fun.

As for wedding tips, I would say to watch the seasons. If you really like tiger lilies but want to get married during their off season, you will have to either pay more to have imported flowers or you will have to settle for artificial flowers or even a different flower. Same goes with foods and fresh fruits.

Well that is all for now, ttfn

Trying something new

So I started this summer with the idea of losing weight. And I lost some, a whole 15 net pounds, but I had a hard time thinking I could do that forever. When the school year started, I admit that I was NOT following WeightWatchers and I felt guilty all the time about it.

And, to top it all off, I have come across a some articles about how nearly impossible weightloss is.

When I tell people how much I weigh and how much I want to lose, nearly everyone is surprised. It's apparent that I am heavy set and I do jiggle, but I am not overly fat. I fit in normal rollercoaster ride seats and on airplanes and in theaters. I've never had a problem with that.

I think what my real problem is that I have so much of my self esteem tied up in my weight that I feel that I can't feel good about myself until I look like a supermodel. That's not going to happen, no matter how much I want it. What I really need to do is learn how to love myself the way I am.

So, today, I cancelled my subscription to WeightWatchers and I bought a book on Amazon called Health at Every Size: the Surprising Truth About Your Weight. I heard about the book in Newsweek in which it detailed how the book came about and was tested with a government backed university study. The book is about helping you learn to follow internal clues for hunger and what things you should eat but it is NOT a weightloss book.

I'm going to read it and give it an honest try because WeightWatchers isn't working for me anymore. I was completely burned out on counting and tracking and the food got boring.

I hope this helps me feel better about me.

Ttfn

Weightloss? tip of the day: You have to love yourself the way you are.

All of August Was Terribly Busy

Note the title.

In August, I finished my internship, rushed home, spent time with my sister, watched Big Bang Theory Season 1, got to the hospital just in time to be there when my new niece was born, when back to Lafayette, worked out new student loans and started school.

So please forgive me for not writing much.

Recently, I have been having a hard time sticking to my diet (like today). I think it is because I am around so many people who aren't in the same position I am diet wise. However, I am staying motivated with my promise of a new tattoo and now that I have it planned, all I need to do is lose that 15 lbs so I can get it. (Yes, 15lbs, I gained some weight in August :'( ) What I want are the words "Leap before you look" in a nice curly font on my right foot, starting on the side and working across the top my foot. I think it'll be quite beautiful.

Also, at some time later, I don't know yet, I want to get three stars on my other foot.

I have realized how much I love to see this art on my body and it feels like a great tribute to who am I. I know that some of you are appalled by my love of tattooes but understand that it is my way of expressing myself. I am not good at drawing or taking pictures as I am not patient enough for either but I feel like my vision can come true with the help of some talented people at a tattoo parlor using me as their canvas.

And it is Thursday, so it is time for another wedding planning tip.

Flower arrangements are rather easy to do. If you are short on cash, think about having a flower arranging party a day or two before the wedding to get everything done yourself for cheaper than what it would have been to have the florist do it. Remember, though, to order some extra flowers in case of accidents.

Well that's all for now. Ttfn!

Happy Hump Day

I'm sorry. I happen to have a very boring and uneventful life.

But there are exciting things happening.

My sister, Annie, is about to have her first child. She is a few weeks from her due date but the amniotic fluid around the baby is running low so they the baby needs to be born soon to make sure everyone is safe. Since she is within six weeks of her due date, the baby, Nayomi Alane, will have a very high chance of survival. Annie is starting to get nervous but has been able to keep a steady mind through all the stress. Unfortunately, it looks like the baby might come before I get home. I wish I could be there for her but I know that we need to do whats best for the baby. I can't wait all the same.

I am nearing the end of my internship and I am already done. With everything. Completely done (sort of). I have a presentation to give the Thursday after next which I am almost ready to give. I am ready for a practice run to check timing and then for a couple real runs. I just want to get it done and over with. I'm homesick and am ready to leave.

Well, that was a peak into my boring life. Ttfn.

Weight-loss tip of the day - Fruits and veggies are yummy so eat more of them!

Well then

I may have been slightly bad these past few days but now I am back.

The past week has been ultra busy. I saw the movie Moon. I didn't get much done at work. I did laundry and stayed up late with friends. I made a cheesecake from scratch!

But this past weekend was the best of all.

On Friday, I and a bunch of friends from work got together and made chicken tacos (and soy tacos for my vegetarian friend) while watching The Matrix. We also made a cheesecake.

Then I woke up early on Saturday and donned my swimsuit for the beach! I had never seen the ocean before and I don't know if I can describe how beautiful it is. Or salty. It isn't like in movies with the water lazily lapping on the beach. The ocean is a power beast that attacks the sand and tosses it about. Swimming in the ocean was tons of fun and very exhausting. The waves push and pull you about and it takes some practice before you can get out past where the waves break. You have to be careful of things like jellyfish, the people in front of you and all the things you can kick in the ocean. All in all, I hurt my toes, got kicked in the face and was mysteriously cut on the nose.

I spent about three hours in and around the water. The waves were too rough for me as the tide started coming in so I decided to go lay on the sand and enjoy the sun. Two hours later, I am well rested and very burned but it was all worth it.

Then we went back to the suites and ate a bit of cheesecake before going to sleep. I didn't sleep well because my hurt foot spent the entire night making me uncomfortable but I did get up for church. After church, I had more movies and more cheesecake.

Then I weighed myself.

Let me recap the last four weigh-ins, 208 lbs, 209 lbs, 209 lbs, 210 lbs

I weighed in at 203 lbs!

That was just the icing on the cake of a wonderful weekend.

Ttfn everyone!

Weight-loss tip of the day: Don't get discouraged by plateaus. Push through them!

Another Thursday!

I cannot express how excited and nervous I am for Kk's wedding this weekend. I cannot wait to get on the plane and get home and see everyone. I cannot wait to stand at her side as she marries the most perfect man in all the world for her. I just cannot wait!

But enough about that, lets talk about the wedding tip of the week.

Weddings, as I mentioned last week, are stressful and difficult to coordinate. There are flowers to order, cakes to design, tuxes to rent, bridesmaids to dress and the list goes on. No couple should ever have to plan their wedding alone.

Now I am not saying that everyone needs to fork up their hard earned cash for a wedding planner. All you really need are friends to help you along the way.

So find a friend that is good with pastry to help you figure out how you want your cake to look then give her a budget to go and order the cake. You'll have the final say so on price and look but you will be able to skip the shopping around part. Give your bridesmaids a picture of what kind of dress you want them to wear and let them shop for the best match. Have a flower party to help decide what flowers you want.

All of these little things will help along the way and help renew your friendships that you will need after you get married. (You can't spend all your time with one person!)

Well that's all for now. Ttfn!

Weight loss tip of the day: When travelling, pack your own food.